I'm afraid of being busy.
I get anxious when I don't think I will be able to get everything done that needs to get done. I feel overwhelmed when I look at a color-coated planner with a rainbow of words across every inch of space.
Perhaps you are afraid of being busy, too. Perhaps the demands of life seek to wash over you. Perhaps you, too, struggle with enjoying God's work for you today instead of just anticipating the weekend.
If so, I have some encouragement for you today.
This past semester has been, in a word, busy. I had four jobs, school, church, family, and other things like cleaning my room, showering, and necessary parts of life. People often asked me if I had time to sleep or have a social life. I didn't.
I faced my fear of busyness all semester, and it was rough. I can't say that I enjoyed it or handled it well, either. More often than not, you could have found me watching Friends in my spare minutes because I didn't want to try to think about anything. I tried to push my way through the tasks and deadlines, not really submitting to God or resting in the gospel. I didn't feel like I had time for that.
In the beginning of the year, I focused on a word and quality of God for 2019. The quality of God is faithful and the word is renew. I rejoice now in seeing how God prepared me for this season of busyness with those two words.
For in my unfaithfulness during this busy season, God proved Himself faithful. When I faltered, He was unfaltering. When I gave up, He pressed on. When I numbed my mind with Netflix, God stayed close, reminding me of Himself.
"If we are unfaithful, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is." (2 Tim. 2:13)
He is not going to leave us. He doesn't grow weary of us even when we grow weary of ourselves. This is really true! This is an eternal hope for our souls. He will remain faithful even if we are anything but faithful. That hope is not conditional upon our own behavior, feelings, or success, but solely upon Jesus. And Jesus never fails.
In time of busy, it is important to remind ourselves that God holds our hand, even when our hands are full. He will never let go, for He is a faithful God.
Not only is God faithful, but He renews us. Yes, there is abundant grace for us in overwhelming seasons, for God Himself is our hope and strength. He will renew our spirit.
As I thought about the word renew this past semester, I wanted it to apply to my own ability to get things done. But that is not what the renewal of God is about. No, He renews our minds so that we can see more clearly His will, which is what really matters. His renewal is one of hope, not that everything will go perfectly but that He will make everything perfect.
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." (2 Cor. 4:16-17)
We are renewed in order to get a little closer to this glory, this surpassing beauty that outshines productivity and success and dreams come true. God renews our spirit not so that we can get chase our dreams but so that He may become our dream.
And in this hope, in this vision of Jesus, we will also find strength to press forward with the challenges at hand, that we may glorify Jesus through hard work and joyful spirits.
"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." (Col. 3:17)
I'm not done facing my fear of being busy, but God has given me comfort, perspective, conviction, and practice in leaning into His faithfulness and depending upon His renewal. I hope that you discover in Him a love far greater than every fear, including the fear of being busy.
Please leave a comment below with how you deal with busyness and what God has been revealing to you about this.
Princess Hannah
P.S. PIVOT
